Forty days and forty nights, tested and tempted, October 31st 2020 – 9th December 2020

Hello again.

I have been dreading writing this post, I even considered not providing details. But I believe I have to write my full story, so I will.

Please read the previous post before starting to read this one though, as you’ll better appreciate the build-up to this period. As I lay in bed on the night of 31st October 2020, immediately after laying down, after my prayer for an explanation of what had happened, the Word let me know the following, and these were the exact words I was given in my head:

‘You were deceived, and today was the start of 40 days and nights of tempting and testing’.

(EDIT….I checked my notes and also a whatsapp chat I had with John in Kenya, and I was not shown that I was undergoing 40 days of testing and tempting until the night of 3rd November. So that made the 1st -3rd November especially difficult, as I had no idea what was happening at all).

I am 100% sure that the testing and tempting was not done by the entity that I always refer to as Satan, but I didn’t know that at the time, I was shown this a while after the period had passed. He is one of the fallen angels, their names are mentioned in Enoch, I can’t remember the name of the leader, and it’s not worth learning it, as their time is very short now. So I will keep referring to the devil as Satan, to keep things simple.

The tempting and testing was done by the same angel that tested Abraham, when he was asked to sacrifice Isaac. This angel is not a fallen rebellious angel, he is an angel that God created as a kind of foil, to test men, and to give my Father the opportunity to have them tested, and ultimately to refine them and through that to demonstrate to the world, to readers of scripture, that these men love and fear God, and are absolutely devoted to him. This is mentioned in Jasher, chapter 22 (it’s worth reading chapter 23 as well):

And Yehovah said to the adversary (has-sa-tan, means literally ‘the adversary’), Hast thou thus considered my servant Abraham? for there is none like him upon earth, a perfect and an upright man before me, one that feareth God and avoideth evil; as I live, were I to say unto him, Bring up Isaac thy son before me, he would not withhold him from me, much more if I told him to bring up a burnt offering before me from his flock or herds.

And the adversary answered Yehovah and said, Speak then now unto Abraham as thou hast said, and thou wilt see whether he will not this day transgress and cast aside thy words.

These are virtually the same words that my Father spoke about Job, in chapter 1:

Then Yehovah said to the adversary, “Have you considered My servant Job? For there is no one on earth like him, a man who is blameless and upright, who fears God and shuns evil.”

9The adversary answered Yehovah, “Does Job fear God for nothing? 10Have You not placed a hedge on every side around him and his household and all that he owns? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land. 11But stretch out Your hand and strike all that he has, and he will surely curse You to Your face.”

12“Very well,” said Yehovah to the adversary. “Everything he has is in your hands, but you must not lay a hand on the man himself.”

55 And the adversary answered Yehovah and said, Speak then now unto Abraham as thou hast said, and thou wilt see whether he will not this day transgress and cast aside thy words.

The reason we can be certain that the adversary is not one of the fallen angels is because they were cast out of heaven for their rebellion, and have never got anywhere near God’s throne ever since, unlike the adversary mentioned above. So, this adversary is the same angel that tested the Lord Yahshua in the wilderness for 40 days, and the same one who tested me too, it’s always the same angel, the foil, the accuser. This adversary is the angel that says to Abraham ‘Do not lay a hand on the boy or do anything to him,” said the angel, “for now I know that you fear God, since you have not withheld your only son from Him.” (Yes, another bad translation, which falsely gives the impression that my Father did not know in advance what Abraham would do. He knew exactly what would happen, it was the angel that didn’t know. This bad translation fooled me for 3 years, into thinking that we have free will AND that therefore God doesn’t know what we will do, or what the future holds. Now I know better. You see how important it is to read the Apocryphal books, and why apocrypha means ‘hidden’. The enemy hid them from us, but we were meant to get the full truth in these times. So read them).

In Mark he is referred to as ‘the devil’, and in Matthew as ‘Satan’, but both Greek words mean the same thing if you want to look, and they’re not names, just adjectives. This foil, the adversary, does think well of himself and isn’t a fan of men generally, but unlike the fallen angels, he isn’t allowed to harm the righteous men being tested beyond limits set by my Father, with different limits and tests for different men. The fallen angels, you will recall, literally mated with the early daughters of men, creating giants with evil natures. Bear in mind I have stared Satan (the enemy of God, a fallen angel) in the eyes, from a distance of less than a foot, when he had possessed one of my cats, and I saw the burning malevolent hatred. I didn’t get any of that during the 40 days, but what I got was actually much worse than staring into Satan’s eyes, that was a piece of cake.

This also proves something else, something that I have been shown recently, which is that the fallen angels, let’s call their chief Satan, have never, at any stage been given dominion over the earth. That is a plain lie of his, which has been pushed by Rome and the churches, to instill a sense of defeatism upon everyone. But it’s crap, as King Alfred the Great proved, as King David proved, through their reigns, man does have dominion still, not the fallen angels. They constantly work to undermine men and my Father’s laws, and to grasp control, but it was never given to them. So, if that’s the case (and scriptures show it’s the case), how did the adversary offer it to Yahshua? Well, he didn’t, he was just tempting him with a conditional offer of something that Yahshua knew was his already (or rather it had been promised to him at that point), and we have yet another bad Roman translation here (this one is a classic). Here is the original, from Luke 4:

Then the devil led him up to a high place and showed him in an instant all the kingdoms of the world. 6“I will give you authority over all these kingdoms and all their glory,” he said. “For I deliver it to you, and I can give it to anyone I wish. 7So if you worship me, it will all be yours.” 8But Yahshua answered, “It is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God and serve Him only.’

Here is the correct translation:

Then the devil led him up to a high place and showed him in an instant all the kingdoms of the world. 6“To you is given authority over all these kingdoms and all their glory,” he said. “For it has been given to me, and if I wish, I can give it to you. 7So if you worship me, it will all be yours.” 8But Yahsua answered, “It is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God and serve Him only.’

It is only a slight change, but it makes a huge difference (check the Greek yourself if you wish, it is the ‘I’ and ‘you’ that has been fiddled with). The reason it makes a huge change is that by this stage of the proceedings in Yahshua’s life, he knew exactly who he was, and that he had already been given authority over the nations. But everything he knew, he knew through the word, like me, so it was all a matter of faith that he knew it, because he hadn’t seen God, or spoken to Him, it was all a oneness with the Word. So, it was great deception attempt by the adversary. If he had said the Roman deceptive translation, Yahshua would have not even treated it as a deception, because Yahshua knew the scriptures, the prophets, and knew that the only person in history to whom authority over the whole earth was promised was him! So, the adversary had to play into that knowledge and lie and test Yahshua, making him think that him getting the promised authority was contingent on him worshiping the adversary. Yahshua saw through it though, and quoted scriptures to rebuff the test. I hope you can see that the test was a good one, when correctly translated, and also how it fits the enemy Satan’s narrative that he has authority here on earth (only in his dreams). If you are doubting me still, do you think Yahshua was a liar, or the adversary. What did Yahshua himself say in Matthew 28:18:

Then Yahshua came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me.

So, who do you believe, the Roman translation, or the words of the son of God, the messiah, the Lord Yahshua? Because they can’t both be correct can they? Satan couldn’t deceive us with a bad translation in Matthew 28:18, but he tried it in Luke 4, and the Romans and their priests and pastors fooled pretty much everyone didn’t they, with that false doctrine. I will note here, that I had zero intention when I sat down to write this evening of showing that deceptive translation, but my Father showed me a little while ago that Satan never had dominion, and he also showed me that it was the adversary doing the testing of all of the men I mentioned, not the fallen angels, and so it’s wonderful to reveal yet another lie through a deceptive translation, as I write, in real time. Feels good, so good. It’s me fulfilling prophesy too, Yahshua’s prophesy from John 15:26:

“When the advocate is come whom I will send to you from the Father’s presence–the spirit of truth who comes forth from the Father’s presence–he will be a witness concerning me.

So, on 1st November I just noted that Jeremiah 51 played during my random audio listening of the scriptures. It’s a long chapter, mostly concerning the judgement and wrath and destruction that is headed for Babylon. We don’t know who Babylon is at this stage, but it won’t be Iraq. Almost certainly is is Rome, the fake and evil catholic church empire that still exists, with the daughter of Babylon the Protestants all around the world. The verses that mention my role are copied below:

“You are My war club,

My weapon for battle.

With you I shatter nations;

with you I bring kingdoms to ruin.

21With you I shatter the horse and rider;

with you I shatter the chariot and driver.

22With you I shatter man and woman;

with you I shatter the old man and the youth;

with you I shatter the young man and the maiden.

23With you I shatter the shepherd and his flock;

with you I shatter the farmer and his oxen;

with you I shatter the governors and officials.

24Before your very eyes I will repay

Babylon and all the dwellers of Chaldeae

for all the evil they have done in Zion,”

declares Yehovah.

That was all I wrote for that day, but I was feeling miserable about the night before, wondering what was coming, and I was starting to have bad thoughts. I had so many bad thoughts during the 40 days and nights, and I won’t jump the gun as to why, I will explain things as I experienced them.

So, a bad thought I noted down on 2nd November related to the incident that initiated my Father entering my temple back in early April (I find it amusing that so much happened in early April that I cannot remember the date this happened, nor the date when I first met God). That incident was my Father and Yahshua laughing at a bad accent in a twitter video, as I explained in a post. The bad thought was doubts about the rightness of God and Yahshua laughing at a brother-in-Christ, even if only due to a bad accent, and even if the joke would never have been know to the twitter poster, were it not for my comment. The thought I had was simply that it was wrong to laugh at someone in our family. Plus, I knew some personal information on the troubles the twitter poster had suffered, he had told me voluntarily some things. (Subsequently, during the 40 days period, I had a very bad experience with the twitter poster, and my Father has shown me that he has a bad heart, very proud, all sorts of problems with his faith, so I know now that the laughter was not bad, and I also know now that the twitter poster is ignorant of the laughter, and also the accent being laughed at is mentioned by my Father as being that of the rabbi, which the twitter poster impersonates).

To compound this bad thought came another awful thought, which was ‘Am I being laughed at for being deceived, is it all a sick joke’ (that’s the notes I wrote down, verbatim). I think I will just list my notes now, to demonstrate the depths of my misery on 2nd November 2020:

Why is Satan released after 1,000 years to cause war? Why is Satan here now? Ezra’s question to Uriel in 2 Esdras (along the lines of ‘would it not be better for men to be like the dumb animals’)? Was I being laughed at for being fooled? Sick joke? Suspended ministry and offerings. Prayers for clarity and help/guidance and not to do anything stupid (note..this refers to my regular prayers, I ask for these things most days). I look stupid again.

It doesn’t really get much more depressive and miserable than that does it? Just a load of doubts and misery, feeling my prayers had been ignored, and looking stupid as I hadn’t been taken to heaven, and I had spoken publicly about expecting to, here at the blog, and to friends and family. So, frankly, I was pissed off with it all, and I was pondering suspending both my ministry and sabbath/new moon offerings. Just deleting the website and the old blog entirely. I have decided to share the thoughts I shared with John in Kenya via whatsapp. I have already apologised to my Father and asked His forgiveness for my trespass in this matter (as I wrote the word ‘trespass’, I am listening to random play music on itunes, it is playing my favourites that I played the most during 2020, it was playing a song called ‘Controversy’ by Prince (heh), and the word ‘trespasses’ was spoken, a fraction of a second after I wrote it, as Prince was saying the Lord’s prayer. Further proof that my Father knows exactly what is going to happen in advance, to the finest detail. Impressive stuff). So, here is the whatsapp chat, be warned, not for the faint of heart, and I winced as I re-read what I had written:

I did thank John for his support later in this chat, he handled it all really well, and it helped me a lot, I am sure my Father placed him as a friend for many reasons, including to help keep me from completely losing the plot at that time, although early in November, before I realised I was going through the 40 days, I had already lost the plot. Honestly, I am wincing as I write, at having to think back to that time. Maybe I should just write ‘I was tested and tempted by the adversary for 40 days and nights and leave it at that’? I won’t do that, because there is a very valuable lesson to be had from my experiences, one that will be of help to brothers and sisters who are subject to supernatural attacks on their minds/faith by the enemy. We fight against spiritual forces, not physical attacks, so I will explain what I was taught near the end of the 40 days, how to defeat the thoughts the enemy can place in our minds.

Fortunately, my Father is way ahead of the game, so He showed me a prophetic video, and although I have been critical of this channel’s recent prophesies, this one resonates as a message from my Father for me, and the video He showed me on 3rd November explained a few things I needed to know. Here is the link to the video, but to save you time, there is a transcript beneath it, and I will copy that here:

You are one of My loyal faithful, servants. I know you are suffering, it must be. You stand with many called to do My work on earth. How can one be meek and humble unless the trial is fierce. I have sent My warriors to surround you, to battle with the serpent that seeks you. He is trying to break your spirit. He knows how many are blessed and healed using the power I gave you. You must put on your armor and fight this fight. This is the end of the great battle for souls. I will give you strength to continue and finish. I will pour out My favour on you because you have come this far. I know your thoughts, heard what you were thinking in your desperation. My hedge is around you. I am with you always. I will speak to you in the night. Call on Me. I will show you things no man has ever seen.

I have highlighted the key sentence in the prophecy, that is the phrase that stuck with me. So, I took it as a genuine message from my Father at the time, and I still do. I felt somewhat better, but not anything like my normal self.

Also on the same day I was played a song, I can’t remember how, it is in my music library, but I hadn’t heard it for well over a decade, so I had totally forgotten it, but as you will see, the lyrics are appropriate. The song is called ‘Horse and I’, by a singer who goes by the name Bat For Lashes:

Got woken in the night
By a mystic, golden light
My head soaked in river water
I had been dressed in a coat of armour
They called a horse out of the woodland
“Take her there, through the desert shores”

They sang to me, “This is yours to wear”
“You’re the chosen one, there’s no turning back now”

The smell of redwood giants
A banquet for the shadows
Horse and I
We’re dancers in the dark
Came upon a headdress
It was gilded, dark and golden
The children sang
I was so afraid
I took it to my head and prayed

They sang to me, “This is yours to wear”
“You’re the chosen one, there’s no turning back”
They sang to me, “This is yours to wear”
“You’re the chosen one, there’s no turning back now”

There is no turning back
There is no turn
There is no turning back
There is no turn
There is no turning back
There is no turn

I don’t think it needs much explanation, if you’ve been reading here for a while, you’ll know that will be the rider of the white horse of Revelation 6 and 19, and I am chosen by my Father for this role, and there is no turning back from that.

So, I went up to bed on 2nd November 2020 feeling miserable. I can’t remember if I prayed or not. Normally I pray every night, but there were many nights when I didn’t during this 40 day period. I lay down in bed, I always lay on my back for a little while, before turning over on to my front to sleep. Suddenly, something crawled across my mouth, and I let out a cry, something along the lines of ‘shit’, and swiped it off, it felt like it was a spider. I sat up in bed and switched on the light, and sure enough it was a spider, which was still on the bed by the pillow, so I whacked it with the bottom of my hand, and killed it. It was one of those small bodied, long-legged spiders, and I was surprised at how much blood there was. My heart was pumping, and I was thinking ‘there’s no way I am going to get through another 39 days and nights of this’. Here are some dead spider photos:

I tend to just leave spiders be, I am less scared of them now than I was before I found my faith, and this sort of spider I will pick up if they need moving, but not the bigger spiders. Obviously this spider had to be killed, to give me a chance of sleeping that night.

That night I had some dreams that were all about injustice at work. I can’t remember the specifics now, but it was a very vivid dream. I have experienced multiple injustices during my career, especially when at the bank, when area managers, and higher-ups were very often evil little hitlers. But I took them all on, and didn’t lose once. Perhaps all of those experiences were preparation for these times. I also noted the next morning (again a sign of my misery and despair at that time):

‘God needs to cut things short as I’m lost’. I wrote in messages to John in Kenya: ‘I can no longer tell if I’m hearing from God or the enemy. If God wants to use me, He will need to give me clear communications. I’m like a ship lost at sea currently. Wasting my time. I’m suspending my offerings, no longer sure if they’re authorised by God, or a deception. I will still be assisting you financially, not with doctrine.’

John replied with a message of encouragement though, he thought that God was still using me and that clarity would come. John also gave the correct scriptural response on my earlier question about why is Satan released after the 1,000 year millennium reign, which is in order to face final judgement, and it will be a very brief period between release and judgement. I also asked questions about who exactly Satan will deceive when he is released, because I had assumed back then that only the meek/saints/elect would be on the earth during the 1,000 years (that’s not what I think now). I decided to copy the whatsapp conversation up above, this post is all over the place isn’t it? Never mind.

So, I was shown during the night of 3rd November, as I had just laid down in bed, that I had been deceived about the visit to heaven happening on 31st October, and that the 31st was the first day of the 40 days of testing and tempting, which took me up to 9th December. Knowing this made things somewhat easier, as at least I knew what was going on, even though I dreaded the remaining 36 days.  The tempting side of things started that night too, with very strong sexual urges during the night. The next day I told John in Kenya that I now knew what was going on, and that I was sure I would be able to cope. His response included an offer of his daughter to be my wife, if I liked her and assuming I could visit Kenya to meet the family. Here are the screenshots:

It was good of him to offer, but it won’t happen, partly as I won’t have that option until the second exodus time at the earliest (more likely to happen after the day of wrath though I suspect), from March 2029 until September 2032, but mostly because John sent me a couple of photos of her and I wasn’t physically attracted to her.

Also on 4th November, while I was listening to Apple music, and what they call ‘Gary’s Station’, a very dark-sounding song came on that I had never heard before, and I heard the word Malachi, which obviously caught my interest. I took some screenshots of the lyrics as the song played, which I have copied below, along with some details on the word in Hebrew:

It would be accurate to call those lyrics demonic, or Satanic. I don’t know why the song played, it had no effect on me, I knew the test was on, and stuff like this didn’t scare me or worry me at all. Malachi, mal-ak in Hebrew, means ‘angel’. Many surmise the book of Malachi was given by an angel, as there’s no record of man or prophet called Malachi, as far as I am aware.

My friend Jamal’s baby was born on this date, a lovely little girl. So, his promise to name him after me was null, as it wasn’t a boy. Maybe next time. I also started to get the same poor health symptoms that I suffered during the six months after my baptism: low energy, weak legs, a scratchy throat, and bad guts. I suspected that this was tied to the start of the testing period, and hoped it wouldn’t last for the whole 40 days.

On 5th November 2020 I made a peace offering to my Father, mostly because of all of the bad things I had written and thought about Him in the previous few days. I sprinkled some of the blood on the altar, in accordance with the law given in Leviticus 3, and with more details in Leviticus 7. Please note, the flesh is eaten by the person making the peace offering, but the fat and others parts of animal are burnt (such as kidneys and livers). Fat is never to be eaten, at any time (Leviticus 3:17). It was the first time during the testing that I felt a bit better, as I was doing what I should have been doing, given my bad words about my Father.

That same day I woke up to seven comments notified on youtube, and also seven facebook notifications. One of the youtube comments was part of the test:

It’s the same old lie that Satan pushes, that death is preferable to eternal life with my Father and the Lord on the new earth. My reply to his comment is in the first screenshot, but I had to expand his comment to show it all. So, you will see, I gave him shirt shrift, at that time I did not believe this lie. It is a lie I have mentioned before, and others have been faced with the same lie too, so be aware of it, when tough times come.

Overnight on 6th November 2020 I had a bad night, with terrible dreams, horrible sexual stuff that I can’t possibly share, truly horrific though. I prayed whilst I was in bed, and invoked the power of the blood of the Lord to make it stop, and it did stop. That was a good example of my faith holding and helping me during a test. The next day I mentioned to John in Kenya that his daughter was wearing trousers in the photo he had sent me, and that this needed to be rectified, and he agreed with me.

I stopped making notes for the next 14 days, from 8th until 21st November, as I was too distracted by the tests, didn’t feel like doing anything, it was just a matter of survival. I did make some notes on 21st November, as best as I could remember, for the days that I had missed. I noted that Yahshua was tested out with the wild animals, and noted that I was in amongst birds, deer, hedgehogs, and a fox. I had a comment directed to me on facebook that was obviously trying to scare me, as it alluded to the village in which I live. He is a pre-trib believer, and a lawless pagan faker (the two very often go together), and I was trying to show him the truth (but wasting my time):

The comment in the final screenshot is the reference to where I live, in a village called Sparkwell, which I have written about many times before on the blog. The demon using that person was trying to scare me somehow, that my spark-well ‘hideout’ would not be mine for long. It didn’t scare me, but it was another example of the attempts to do so.

I was reported by a woman on youtube for the transmission of terrorist threats at this time, after I left a comment under a Christopher Hitchens video. This one is really very funny though:

Snowflake generation there in all of its glory. She literally did report me for the warning I gave, but nothing came of it. Ironically, my Father is worthy of great fear because He is terrible, and the etymology of ‘terrible’ shows that the word derives from ‘worthy of terror’, so on a deeper level, the poor girl was feeling the terror of what lies ahead, and maybe there is a youtube rule against transmissions of terrorist threats? But I laughed. I also was played a song called Avenging Angels, but I will cover that in another post, good lyrics though.

At some point during period when I made no notes, on several occasions at night, I suffered a supernatural sexual assault, with the best way to describe it was that I was supernaturally masturbated. The first time it happened, I couldn’t stop it, and had to get out of bed and come downstairs and do something, to stop it, as otherwise there would have been an inevitable conclusion, and that would have been a failure of a test. Really not pleasant to see what can be done to us by supernatural forces. I felt like I was at their mercy too, more or less defenceless.

I was very depressed, to the point of having frequent daydreams about how to kill myself. They were only daydreams, I was never going to kill myself at any stage, because I have eaten from the tree of life already and so I couldn’t kill myself even if I wanted to. But I felt bad enough to daydream about it. Then there was another weirdo on facebook who alluded to 40 days/40 years in a comment that I spotted, and he was stating that we should not even get baptised until we are at least 40 years old. His facebook thread and further comments showed that he was being used by a demon, so much evil heresy.

During this period I read about some of the saints who were martyred in the time of the Maccabees. I cried like a baby at the level of evil, and at the bravery of the saints I read about, and I wrote a post about them, to honour them. Please read the post, as the saints in the great tribulation may suffer torture too, it may not be a quick beheading or shooting. Their bravery and faith and righteousness was uplifting to me at that time, it will help you too I hope.

I missed three days of prayer, and I was shown that the Lord’s prayer was derived from the Lord’s 40 days of testing and temptation, and not just because of the request to keep us from testing/temptation. I don’t know what Yahshua’s tests were, apart from the final episodes mentioned in scripture, but I can guarantee they would have been pitched at a level to make him utterly miserable. My Father knew what the Lord could stand, and the adversary knew how to test and tempt him, and remember he was a man, so he was able to be tempted, and could have failed too. The Greek word is ‘peirazo’ (Strong’s 3985), and it means ‘test, tempt, try’. Thankfully, the Lord passed the 40 days successfully.

My testing was centred on my thoughts being invaded by the entity testing me. In the first few weeks I was constantly thinking that the whole of life on earth was just a game, played by supernatural entities for their own amusement, with humans as players in the game, and that it was a game from which there was no escape, ever, the cycle just repeats between ice ages. I was given thoughts that my Father wasn’t the creator of the universe, but that He and the heavenly host were all banished here on earth, forever, for being evil. So, they hated the planet and hated the creatures that were already here when they arrived (which I was thinking was only relatively recently). I had thoughts that I had no wish whatsoever to play these games. Most nights I was either mentally attacked, with dark thoughts and nightmares, or sexually assaulted, or suffered mild physical pains in various parts of my body, often a dull ache in legs, then arms, but also stomach pain, only mild, but enough to prevent sleep. The lack of sleep was terrible after a few nights. I did nothing all day, often getting out of bed after midday. I was eating very little, and didn’t leave the house for weeks, except to buy food.

However, through the first few weeks, I did not sin, I did not miss any Sabbaths and offerings, nor the new moon day offering on November 15th. So why did I make the offerings, even when I wasn’t praying, and felt trapped in a game? The main reason was that I still greatly feared God, and imagined He would be angry if I started to ignore His laws. Also a significant reason was that I just didn’t want to sin, I didn’t want to fail the test, I am very competitive, and don’t like losing. These two factors were keeping me righteous, and enabling me to please God, even as I was having terrible thoughts about Him and everything that was supernatural. So I made the offerings, even though I don’t think I made my usual prayer beforehand, and I didn’t enjoy doing it, I still did it. You may think that my Father wouldn’t really want offerings from someone who was doing it our of fear, and to avoid sinning, and if you think that, you don’t know Him at all. He has no interest in offerings from those who are otherwise full of sin. But He values offerings from righteous man who fear Him, because fear of Him is through faith. Those who don’t fear Him don’t know Him, and how terrible He is. If you think He’s a God that loves everyone (the fluffy bunny churchy god) you wouldn’t fear Him either, and you aren’t making offerings anyway. So, my delight in the fear of God kept me going, and I am really glad it did, that I can look back on those weeks and say ‘I did not sin’.

I also received threats from someone on twitter at this time, very strange but direct threats. Interestingly, the account making the threats was the same account that my Father and the Lord had laughed at just before they entered my temple (to which I referred earlier in the post). I had previously had issues with this account, on my old twitter account, and more recently, so I knew he was difficult, but this video I took of the threats he made showed me that he has a very black heart, and so I know now that my Father and the Lord were laughing at him because he is not Theirs anyway. I didn’t have twitter on my phone, so I couldn’t take screenshots, and I can’t remember what my tweet was about that had caused him to send me an unsolicited message (I just remember, there was no tweet, he just sent me an unsolicited message, which I think was about satyr-day sabbath, but I could be wrong). I told him I didn’t care about his opinion, and mentioned ‘end of story’, as he had used that line when we had previously discussed the lunar Sabbath, which he doesn’t keep, being of jewish blood, and proud of it, and thinking he’s superior due to that fact. So, video was the best way to capture the messages he sent me, you may need to have the video on full screen to read it though. Here is the video, which is listed privately on youtube, to avoid confusing subscribers there if it appeared with no explanation.  I may make it public when this post is up:

If you were to hear his voice and the rambling videos he posts on twitter, you would see what sort of man he is. I have no idea if the threats and statements he made were genuine or not, but I do know that he quietly waged a campaign amongst the 200 or so twitter followers I had at that time, as I lost around 30 followers in the next few days. He will of course regret his actions in due course, and for a very long time, as he is likely to be facing the wrath of God and 1,000 years in the pits of the earth. Please note the wink in his comments, any time you see someone wink (in real life, or on social media), you should know they have evil in their hearts.

Also, during this period I was shown Zechariah 4:14, and what it meant (note that’s another 4-14, much like the 144,000 elect, numerous other 14-4 verses, and of course my birthday on 14/4. Here are the closing few verses of Zechariah 4:

And I answer and say unto him, ‘What [are] these two olive-trees, on the right of the candlestick, and on its left?’ 12And I answer a second time, and say unto him, ‘What [are] the two branches of the olive trees that, by means of the two golden pipes, are emptying out of themselves the oil?’ 13And he speaketh unto me, saying, ‘Hast thou not known what these [are]?’ And I say, ‘No, my lord.’ 14And he saith, ‘These [are] the two sons of the oil, who are standing by the God of the whole earth.’

I went with the Young’s literal translation for this one, as it correctly translates verse 14, which refers to two sons of the oil, standing by God. I was shown that I am one of those sons, and the Lord Yahshua is the other.

On 21st November (which was day 22 of the 40 days, over the hump and on the ride to the end of it by then) I noted that my faith was back to normal, so I wrote a blog post that day. I felt really happy that I was coping with the tests, with all of it, and although it was miserable and horrible and I hated it all, I was nevertheless very pleased to have survived thus far, sin-free, and still with faith.

I read the book of Tobias at this time, and noted that it was a nice book, and it highlights the value and importance of alms-giving. If you don’t give alms, read the book of Tobias, do a word search in scriptures, and start to do it. I also noted Zechariah 8, which mentions special fasts in the 5th, 7th and 10th months of my Father’s calendar. I will write about fasts at another time, their purpose, and when to do them, and how.

Overnight on 23rd November and into 24th November I was tempted sexually, all day and into the evening, notably with the temptation to watch porn. But I didn’t do that, so that was good. I did relieve myself of the frustration that was building up though, which is not a sin.

Just after I had got into bed on 24th November, before I had turned over on to my stomach to sleep, I felt that I was going to sneeze. The sneeze built up, as they do, and I started to sneeze, but at the last moment the sneeze was taken away by my Father, so I just shouted anyway (I always sneeze loudly), and I found it funny. But then, for the second time (the first being way back in April, when my temple was entered) I felt my Father let out a small chuckle, and I laughed again and I had the thought from His Word ‘that was a miracle’. It was such a nice moment, which I needed at that time.

Sadly I then had five hours of testing and tempting in bed that night, physical pain, sexual stuff, and I just couldn’t get to sleep, so I got up at 04:40. I went back to bed after a period downstairs and then slept til 11.30am. I had a phone call from my mother the next day, and she told me my brother had been reading my blog and I noted that she called me a ‘son of Satan’. I didn’t realise until now that she blasphemed the holy spirit in doing so, and she and my dad have done it again recently too. Then, when I went shopping and had the scriptures playing in the car, Psalm 50 played, and a pertinent verse lies therein:

To the wicked, however, God says, “What right have you to recite My statutes

and to bear My covenant on your lips? 17For you hate My instruction and cast My words behind you.

18When you see a thief, you befriend him, and throw in your lot with adulterers. 19You unleash your mouth for evil and unharness your tongue for deceit.  20You sit and malign your brother; you slander your own mother’s son.

So, there we are, verse 20 is directed at my own brother, who would have guessed that eh?

That night I had a very vivid dream about my Moroccan friend Jamal. In the dream he had scissors and a knife and was trying to cut me with them. He had a white growth in his eyes, which was a cancer. I used the knife he had to remove the cancer, so that he could see. I interpret this to mean that he will eventually see the truth and be baptised in the Lord and enter into God’s kingdom. I have told my Father bluntly that I don’t want to be His king unless my friend Jamal makes it through and his wife and kids. That doesn’t mean I won’t be His king, but I honestly won’t be able to live with any peace and happiness if my one friend in the world isn’t there too. I am sure he will be, once he sees me carrying out my role publicly, with miracles galore, he will believe and will be baptised, he has told me already, he isn’t wedded to Islam, thankfully.

The 25th and 26th November were both bad nights. I haven’t mentioned that all of the attacks came at night, when I was in bed, trying to sleep. Never during the day-time, when I just mostly felt miserable and tired and fed up with the whole thing. So, for these two nights it was constant sexual arousal, and the following night it was mental anguish over the ‘fate versus free will’ issue, for hours in both instances. The next day I was shown Romans 9, which covers that issue in some detail, so I will copy a fair bit of it here:

What then shall we say? Is God unjust? Certainly not! 15For He says to Moses:

“I will have mercy on whom I have mercy,

and I will have compassion on whom I have compassion.”f

16So then, it does not depend on man’s desire or effort, but on God’s mercy. 17For the Scripture says to Pharaoh: “I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display My power in you, and that My name might be proclaimed in all the earth.”g 18Therefore God has mercy on whom He wants to have mercy, and He hardens whom He wants to harden.

19One of you will say to me, “Then why does God still find fault? For who can resist His will?” 20But who are you, O man, to talk back to God? Shall what is formed say to Him who formed it, “Why did You make me like this?”h 21Does not the potter have the right to make from the same lump of clay one vessel for special occasions and another for common use?

22What if God, intending to show His wrath and make His power known, bore with great patience the vessels of His wrath, prepared for destruction? 23What if He did this to make the riches of His glory known to the vessels of His mercy, whom He prepared in advance for glory— 24including us, whom He has called not only from the Jews, but also from the Gentiles? 25As He says in Hosea:

“I will call them ‘My People’ who are not My people,

and I will call her ‘My Beloved’ who is not My beloved,”i

26and,

“It will happen that in the very place where it was said to them,

‘You are not My people,’

they will be called

‘sons of the living God.’ ”

I can say with certainty that this was the time when I became truly and utterly humble before my Father, when He showed me the above and through the Word made me realise that He makes all of us, He is the potter and we are simply His clay. Some of us, many of us, are made to receive His grace, and some are made to receive His wrath, some of His people are created to serve Him in special ways at key times, and some of us are made not to know Him at all, ever. So, where does that leave free will? Honestly, I still think I have free will, I really do, and I am sure that you think you have it too. So, I have free will, but my maker knows what I will do with it, does that sound reasonable. If you’re reading and thinking ‘it all sounds unfair’, then read the scripture above again. And remember, He creates every human in His image, born as a sinless perfect little baby. He doesn’t make or want a single baby to grow up to be a sinner, and not to know their Creator God, but He does give every baby free will, and He has allowed Satan and the fallen angels a very brief 6,000 years here on earth with men, before He takes them out of the picture permanently, and then some of us spend ETERNITY in bliss with my Father, here on earth, as humans, enjoying the planet and His company too. So, 6,000 years, versus forever, and everyone is given the same chance to know Him. His ways are not at all unfair, when you know the full details.

These scriptures made me realise that I am nothing, simply a human tool to be used by my Father, and that the 40 days testing and tempting was to show me the power of the supernatural forces all around me, both the good and the bad, and that I was wholly reliant on my faith in my Father, through the Lord, to have any hope of defeating the evil ones. It showed me that the only approach to the whole of the rest of my life (for eternity) was to feel incredible gratitude that he created everything, that he created me, and that I happen to be predestined to be His second anointed son, and to be His eternal king on earth. All other considerations just fell away frankly, all of it, I just became totally humble before Him, and with that I became more meek, stronger in my faith, fearless of what lies ahead for me. So, a good word from Paul above, please read the whole chapter and see if you can find the way to be more submissive, more holy, trusting only God to save you.

I was also shown Psalm 110 at this time, and was shown that Yahshua remains on the right hand of my Father until he relinquishes his throne to me, and that seat on the right hand side. I was also shown Isaiah 11, which I have mentioned recently, about the root of David (Yahshua) and the branch of David (me).

On 27th November I was listening to scriptures, the new scriptures that I had just started again after finishing the whole of the old and the new scriptures shortly before the 40 days began. I made a note that in the early chapters of Matthew, Yahshua was constantly talking about upholding the laws, about offerings, divorce, all sorts of things, and I saved a few verses and also the verses that he referenced in the law itself. Isn’t it so odd that pastors NEVER talk about this eh? They preach a different Jesus don’t they, the fluffy-bunny Jesus who was all about grace and forgiveness, with no interest in the laws of the Jews. WRONG. Here are the screenshots I saved:

So, as you can read, lots of references to offerings. Yet I got so much stick from ‘christians’ when I was on twitter and facebook, who thought I was some sort of heretic/pagan for making offerings on an altar, as commanded by my Father, and as commanded by Yahshua too. We will see who is correct in due course (spoiler alert, it’s me of course).

Also on 27th I made another peace offering to my Father, and as you can tell by the comments I made when I uploaded the video, my mood was pretty good at that time, I was winning the battle, and was 28 days through the 40, I had broken the back of the tests:

On this day my cat Seve was booked in his for his annual vaccinations. I had been in two minds for weeks about whether to get him done at all, as I knew by then that vaccines were a con, and I had asked my Father for instruction, as I knew that pharma medicines aren’t allowable for His people, so I was concerned that they may not be allowable for His people’s pets too. An hour or so before the appointment the vets phoned to say they would have to postpone the appointment, due to an emergency operation taking place, so that was all I needed to know that I shouldn’t get either of my cats vaccinated, but should simply trust my Father with their welfare.

The 28th November was very frustrating, as I realised that the people I was teaching in Africa (Kenya and also at that point a couple of people in Uganda) were very ignorant of key aspects of our faith. Basic matters like the new covenant itself. Also John in Kenya had builders on his property on 29th November which was a sabbath, and he had just forgotten about it, and he mentioned that a widow we had helped, a friend of his, had sent her son off to school, but he wasn’t allowed to wear tassels, which peeved me greatly, the fact that he hadn’t been pulled straight out of the school.

I was shown on 28th what the seal of God is. I had seen people debating this on facebook groups, and I hadn’t known at that time, but I was shown the scriptures, in Exodus 28, referring to the Levites:

You are to make a plate of pure gold and engrave on it as on a seal:

Holy to Yehovah.

37Fasten to it a blue cord to mount it on the turban; it shall be on the front of the turban. 38And it will be worn on Aaron’s forehead, so that he may bear the iniquity of the holy things that the sons of Israel consecrate with regard to all their holy gifts. It shall always be on his forehead, so that they may be acceptable before Yehovah.

So, that’s what it is. I still have a feeling the seal will be literally on my forehead at some point, and the elect’s too, in the form of a tattoo.

Also on 29th October, which was a sabbath, I was blessed with good weather for the offering, and also with a fly-past of some of the local starling flock, which I captured on video:

The birds live in the tree where they landed at the end of the clip, and it’s wonderful to hear them chattering away through the day, and their funny squabbles when they are feeding. Birds are wonderful creatures, I am very blessed to be out in the country and with dozens of feathered visitors every day. They were the first creatures created too, on the earth (at the same time as the fish and other sea-dwelling creatures).

On 29th November I was shown 2 Chronicles 8, which gives details of King Solomon’s offerings to mark the sabbaths and new moon days:

At that time Solomon offered burnt offerings to Yehovah on the altar of Yehovah he had built in front of the portico. 13He observed the daily requirement for offerings according to the commandment of Moses for Sabbaths, New Moons, and the three annual appointed feasts—the Feast of Unleavened Bread, the Feast of Harvest, and the Feast of Tabernacles.

My mood was quite good at the end of November, as I was learning each night that I was able to eject the depressive thoughts from the adversary, by invoking the power of the blood of the Lord, so I was sleeping better. There were still attacks most nights, but they were not lasting for hours. On 1st December 2020 I was given admin control rights over a facebook group with around 30,000 members. It was a seventh day adventist group, full of nonsense when I took it over, so it was a nice opportunity to do some teaching to a large number, although the level of interaction from members was poor.

I was also played a great song that was very clearly about me (the overcomer mentioned in Revelation 2 and 3), with great lyrics which refer to the second exodus in the mountains of Israel. I knew the singer, as I had her first album and had seen her play live once, but I hadn’t heard this song before. The singer is Laura Mvula and the song is called ‘Overcome’:

For the period up until 4th December I was feeling good, and I noted that I was beating the adversary. However, the final five days were the worst of the whole 40 days, I was anticipating this though, so I coped much better than in the first week of the test period. The nightly attacks were awful, every night, with nightmares and sexual temptations and physical aches and pains. But I was counting the days, and I still hadn’t sinned at all.

The night of the 9th November I assumed to be the final night, and the adversary hit me with everything he had that night, and I was shown by my Father that He and the Lord were not going to offer me any assistance that night at all, I was left alone with the adversary (at that time I was noting Satan, it is only more recently that I have been shown it wasn’t Satan, but the adversary angel that my Father uses). So, I had heavy chest pain that night in bed, and even though I invoked the power of the blood of the Lord, I couldn’t eject the supernatural attacker. I just had to suffer the pain, on my own.

At the worst of it, I would guess this was 4am, I laid on my back, and put my arms behind my back and said the words ‘Why have you forsaken me’. I drifted off to sleep for a short while, and very large aggressive dogs were barking at me in a nightmare. Then I was woken with a start when my hand was touched by another hand. I didn’t see who touched me, but I knew who it was. I don’t fear Satan, but my heart was pumping fast anyway. I lay in bed, and I knew that I had to get out of bed and go to the kitchen, and that there was a good chance I would meet (what I thought at the time was) Satan there, and he would tempt me in person. I really didn’t want to do it, not because I was scared, but because I really couldn’t face seeing him or hearing his bullshit, after all I had been through. But I knew I had to go down there anyway, so I got up, got dressed and went into the kitchen, but no one was there. I went back to bed, somehow knowing that that was the end of the tests, and I went to sleep.

The next morning, when I went into the bathroom, I did what I always do and played a song on the ipad via youtube. As was nearly always the case, before the song started an advert played. But on this morning, the advert that played wasn’t an advert, it was a video especially for me, and there was no link to any website, nothing at all, just the video, which was a minute or so long. I remember certain phrases and images. The phrases were: ‘truth, justice, they will hate you, conceived in love’. The images I recall were of a man speaking to crowds in what can only be described as a war zone. The man was up above the other people, and he was encouraging them, and they were following him. I wish I could see the video again, or have a copy of it for myself, and to show you. By the end of it I was crying like a baby, because I knew it was from my Father, for me, an end-of-test gift.

So, that was the end of the 40 days of testing and tempting by the adversary. I don’t think I have really been able to convey how nasty and horrible it was, but I have done my best. I know why I had to go through it too, to humble me before God completely, to make me realise how powerful our adversaries are and how my (and your) only defence is our faith in God, through belief in His risen son, the Lord Yahshua. I also had to be tested so that my Father could see if I was able to pass the test. If I had failed, who knows what would have come next for me, but He needed to know how I would handle a tough time, because there are many more tough times ahead for me, prophesies make that very clear. It would have been very easy indeed not to make offerings during this period, or to do something stupid like jump off a tall building. But I made the offerings, I kept my faith and fear of my Father through it all, and even though there were times when I resented Him for putting me through it, I knew by the end of the period why I had to be tested and tempted, and I know why Yahshua had to go through it too, for exactly the same reasons. Either one of us could have failed, but neither of us did fail, and ultimately our faith got us through it. I felt joyous and victorious and grateful for the opportunity to be tested and show my love for my Father. And of course He was correct in saying:

How can one be meek and humble unless the trial is fierce?

So, brothers and sisters, if you are going through testing times, please remember this line. Be humble, be meek, trust in God, do not worry, He knows what you can handle and how to refine you, so that He can use you for His glory.

Ever since the 40 days my faith in God, and my confidence in my success in the future have both grown significantly, I no longer suffer frequent days where I used to consider myself unfortunate to have been saddled with such a huge role for my Father, both in the next c.12 years, and the millennium reign I will have thereafter, and indeed forever more. I rarely have even passing thoughts like that these days, and instead, as you have seen, I am very productive, churning out a dozen blog posts in January, and nearly up to date, and eager to finish my study of the law, and eager to see what will happen next for me, as well as lots of other teaching work online and to brothers in Africa too.

I am at maximum meekness, I could not be more fearful of my Father, whilst loving Him greatly, and have literally zero fear of anything else, whether human or supernatural in nature. He has taken me and refined me into His anointed prince, one day to be His King, and His destroyer. He has continued to bless me since the 40 days period ended too, in many ways, so that I am sailing through a very long winter lockdown here in England, at a time when I would normally be having frequent holidays to Morocco. But I am somehow enjoying each day, even when stuck in the house, because I am a man with a mission.

So, if you are going through tough times now, do not worry, at all. If you can simply trust in God and Yahshua, and live a righteous life through your faith, you will get through it. The tough times are only just beginning, and they are going to get so much worse, but my Father will protect the meek, and the righteous. If you are lukewarm with your faith, then you are right to be worried, as you will not be protected at all, you will be spewed out. So, ditch the swine flesh, remember the sabbath and new moon days and holy feast days, and get yourself some tassels. That’s righteous living, in a way that will bless my Father in heaven, and in return He will bless you. You do not want to be on the wrong side of what lies ahead over the next c.12 years.

I give praise to my God, my Father in heaven, in closing. May He be blessed by my faith, and delight in my fear of Him, for He is terrible. May He know and feel my love for Him, as I feel His love for me. May He bless me with the opportunity to meet Him again soon, and the opportunity to see His glory, face-to-face, something I do not fear now, something I really look forward to so much. May my readers be holy and righteous and glorify my Father with their lives, I pray in the name of our Lord Yahshua, and I bless him too, amen.